It's been a long time since I have written. A long, LONG time. For those of you who may be wondering, I did not drop off the face of the earth. I am still right here in the city, doing my thing. I haven't been focusing very much on my blog, because I have had a lot of other stuff going on, as I have mentioned in previous posts.
For awhile I felt like I was failing my adventure year. I felt like if I didn't post insert number of times a month here, then I wasn't doing what I set out to do. The thing is, I am still focusing on the theme for the month, I just haven't had as much time to write about it. Last month was very much an adventure, with letterboxing, a trip to Hocking Hills, and buying dancing lessons that will hopefully start soon. My relationship with Mike is still very new, and every day with him is also an adventure as we grow together and get to know one another. I have also started a huge, time consuming project, which has been eating up most of my free time. All these things have kept me very busy and I haven't had time to blog, and for that I felt profoundly guilty
However, I have been doing a lot of thinking the last few days, and I have decided to drop the guilt and stop putting all these unrealistic expectations on myself. If I am being really honest, I don't really think I am failing my adventure year, I think the adventure year itself has changed some. When I first started this project, I really needed something to keep me and focused and fill my time while I was reeling from the pain of separating from my husband. My adventure year gave me something to do, something to look forward to, while I tried to rebuild my life.
Eight months later I am in a much healthier place and I don't really need it as much as I did before. I am filling in the holes that my divorce left with things that make me happy, new friends, new relationships, new goals. So I am not going to apologize for not writing as much as I used to. I have decided if it's not fulfilling for me to write four times a month then I am simply not going to do it. I am sure you all understand. It doesn't mean I am going to dump the whole project, there are still important things I need to focus on in the months to come, but I am probably going to do it more for myself and not have as large of an online presence as I did before.
I guess what it really comes down to is I am trying to lessen unnecessary stress by doing what makes me happy. Right now, focusing on my other projects and spending time with my friends and family makes me happy, and to me, finding your passion and what makes you feel joyful- that is what life is all about.
"Don't ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and
go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive."
-Howard Thurman
